2012: The Year that shall be

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Happy New Year to all of you.

Over the years I have realized that a couple of days after the first is when the wishes have the maximum impact.

On the first, your broadcast SMS/Mail gets drowned in a flood of messages from other well wishers. Messages usually containing several characters – which I am sure forms some image on the senders phone – unfortunately always arrives garbled on mine. And anyway most people I know are too busy sleeping through the day and as their Out of Office message says will recover somewhere in the “Second Half of 03 Jan or After the first half of Wk01, 2012” depending on the amount of booze consumed on the last day of the previous year. So it boils down to the fact that nobody really reads your message before the 4th. And therefore this post wishing you all on the New Year appears on the 4th.

I hope you have made your new year resolutions. I didn’t bother this year because as we all know that as per the Mesoamerican Long Count Calendar the world is going to end. The movie says so and I always believe all movies – so much research goes into them.

 But there is hope, because you see I have an excellent track record with my convictions. Here’s a few of my very strong convictions in the past few years

  • I was in awe of the finance industry. They seemed to create money out of thin air. I actually spent some time trying to understand derivatives – it seemed so cool – the thing of the future. Leverage was amazing, if not quite comprehensible. I am sure Archimedes had no idea of what he was getting into when he predicted the world will move, given the right amount of leverage. 07-08 laid rest to all my convictions on leverage and derivatives and the world moved in ways nobody could have imagined. (Except a few smart hedge fund managers)
  • I always maintained marriage was the last thing I would do. The closing months of 2008 took care of that very nicely.
  • I was absolutely insistent that entrepreneurship was so low down the priority list of things for me that I would never get around to it. 2008 took care of that too. 
  • I strongly believed that getting a book published was so much of a pipe dream that there was no sense even attempting it. 2009 saw an end to that stand. 
  • I was a big fan of the Euro and always argued for a Global Currency. “Why stop at the Euro, lets have an Eartho!” I always yelled passionately at anyone who even mentioned “currency”. In fact there was a time when just “cur…” was enough for me to launch into my impassioned plea. A waiter at a restaurant asking me about which curry I would like to have is now very well versed in the logic of a universal currency reducing arbitrage opportunities and facilitating faster movement of goods. We all know where he Euro seems to be heading.
  • “Invest in the stock market. Debt instruments are for wuzzies” – I intoned my wife the whole of last year. She raised an immaculately manicured eyebrow and said “Not the right time sweetie. Now stop making a fuss and eat your dinner before it gets cold”. I groaned and mumbled – after all what could be more exciting than taking a lunch-box and going from the living room to the another room and logging in on a trading screen (A certain ad of a certain bank with a trading account facility had be totally convinced). The nifty has reported a net return of -24 odd % for 2011. My wife raised another one of her eyebrows while I sheepishly told her this news (and I ate my dinner quietly)
  • “UID is the ultimate identification. You won’t need all these multiple identification documents. It’s the embodiment of being a truly Indian citizen without any state border restrictions” I told every skeptic. There is somebody out there with a scan of all my fingerprints and a retinal scan while the government bodies now feel that there are data security issues. I sleep peacefully at night, knowing there is little I can do while some genius realizes in hindsight, after every one has handed over all their identification marks, that there might be a problem.

So chances are at the end of 2012 you would be drunk yet again waiting for 2013 to roll in and save you from all those frustrating things that you hoped 2012 would take care of. 

In my next post, my predictions for 2013. Not convictions mind you, predictions. These are a different thing all together. If you want to be incredibly rich, happy in marriage, successful in business, peaceful in life – read my next post. (or go to the local astrologer) 

 

Standard Disclaimer on all this being arbitrary nonsense applied. If you are a blood sucking legal crow trying to get your few minutes of fame rubbishing the content here, don’t waste your time. I already rubbish it myself.

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